woman in mirror is bigger than she appears
It was 19 degrees when we piled into two cars and headed to church with my in-laws last December. There was some quiet grousing, but we all humored my mother-in-law - she wanted to introduce us to her friends.
After the services, a woman stopped us and wanted to know if we were visitors. My MIL did the honors, giving the nod to my SIL and her daughter, and me.
[Now it's important to note, at this point, that I am two years younger than Greg's sister and her daughter is in college.]
The woman grinned and announced - why, God only knows - that she had thought I was the mother of this enormous family. Me. Freshly 36. The matriarch of what, 7 kids between 5 and 38.
I stood stunned and a little hurt, waiting for her to say something to soften the blow. To say she was teasing. To pass me the crack pipe.
Instead, she said it three more times, adding something about my height.
There's no denying I married the tallest person in Greg's family; I am 5'9". I've been tempted to swing my MIL around, give her a airplane ride, but I keep my dark amazon warrior thoughts to myself. I've often felt awkward and clumsy around his petite family; I've been careful to protect my lanky girl from thoughtless comments about her size.
(It is not easy when Lexi could most likely share clothes with her Grandma at age 9.)
I saw Lexi standing there, in the foyer, overhearing this exchange. I made some crack about Yetis and excused myself, my eyes stinging.
My MIL tried to smooth things over, said something about how the Miltons have always been small people, and her friend probably just wasn't used to seeing such big Miltons.
Which is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.
Glorious women come in all shapes and sizes. Her friend was just rude.
After the services, a woman stopped us and wanted to know if we were visitors. My MIL did the honors, giving the nod to my SIL and her daughter, and me.
[Now it's important to note, at this point, that I am two years younger than Greg's sister and her daughter is in college.]
The woman grinned and announced - why, God only knows - that she had thought I was the mother of this enormous family. Me. Freshly 36. The matriarch of what, 7 kids between 5 and 38.
I stood stunned and a little hurt, waiting for her to say something to soften the blow. To say she was teasing. To pass me the crack pipe.
Instead, she said it three more times, adding something about my height.
There's no denying I married the tallest person in Greg's family; I am 5'9". I've been tempted to swing my MIL around, give her a airplane ride, but I keep my dark amazon warrior thoughts to myself. I've often felt awkward and clumsy around his petite family; I've been careful to protect my lanky girl from thoughtless comments about her size.
(It is not easy when Lexi could most likely share clothes with her Grandma at age 9.)
I saw Lexi standing there, in the foyer, overhearing this exchange. I made some crack about Yetis and excused myself, my eyes stinging.
My MIL tried to smooth things over, said something about how the Miltons have always been small people, and her friend probably just wasn't used to seeing such big Miltons.
Which is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.
Glorious women come in all shapes and sizes. Her friend was just rude.
*****
I boo-hooed on Greg's shoulder that afternoon; my feelings were hurt. He had me laughing in no time. This woman had implied I was 80+ years old because I was tall. How could I take that seriously? He sweet talked me until I felt better again, until I remembered I am big in all the ways that matter: generous and vast and full.
_____
Technorati Tags:NaBloPoMo, size, in-laws, rude people, tall
Comments
And yes, you *are* big in the ways that matter most.
Crazy lady, wonderful post.
I work w. seniors as a volunteer and have learned to just chuckle at some of the things they say - sometimes its kooky, sometime obnoxious, but always makes for a good story afterward!
I think that famous old hymn needs to be revised now:
"Praise the Lord and pass the crack pipe..."
With my in-laws, I am the shortest by a long shot. Prior to having children, I always felt so strange being so much shorter than all these adults. I felt like a little kid sitting at the grown-ups table.
(I'm 5'3", my MIL is 5'9". My husband is 6'1" and the shortest of his brother and cousins, who are as tall as 6'7" and 6'9"!)
Thanks for the giggle. You're pretty funny for such an "old" chick ;-)
I know from big.
And you can give me an airplane ride anytime the mood strikes you. (This weekend is going to be FUN!)
My all-time fave comes courtesy of the very bird-like, wig-wearing, passive-aggressive Grand Dame of Church Ladies. She said this to me when I was eight months pregnant and completely miserable:
"My, my Melinda, you're certainly getting wide with this one, aren't you?"
Bonus points: my name is Melanie.
And crack kills, yo.
Passin' the pipe at church. Classic.
You are the nicest Yeti I have ever met ;)
-Stu
PS: Make sure Jen gets a picue of you giving Stephanie an airplane ride.
My mum once ran into the mother of her ex-fiance. My dad and I were standing next to her when the woman said, "And this must be your daughter and her husband..."
She didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
My sum up? The world is full of idiots.
I wonder what she'd think of my family--I'm six feet and right in the middle of things height-wise. Andrew is 5 9 and is the tallest in his family, so he's kind of shrimpy and sad in our family portraits among all the amazons.
now of course i've never heard of using height to judge an adult's age...
Maybe I should hang out with them.
Everyone else has already said what I was thinking - church ladies are crazy and your husband is a sweetheart. I feel your pain - I'm 5'11" so I know from Amazon. And it looks like you've taken the right attitude - what doesn't kill you makes a good blog entry. :P That's my motto.