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Sunday, December 30, 2007

longing

I hopped into Borders yesterday to grab a calendar, preferably not one with a ferret and his drum set. I milled around with the other dozen desperate folks, thumbing through the 50% off castoffs until I found a decent one stashed beneath a stack of Krazy Kats, 2008.

I wandered around, and realized I really don't know this store anymore. New, taller shelves have cropped up; displays have moved. The password to the employee look up system, far better than the customer program, has been changed.

I am locked out of my old world.

I said goodbye to the only face I still recognized there and hurried home.

I hung my new calendar, my sharpie in hand. I started marking it up and sighing big exhausted sighs.

I stood back and looked at my obligations, the path I have chosen.

My gut reaction: I'm a little off-track. I crinkled my nose, and started thinking of the things I'd like to leave behind, come the new year.

And though I am a world weary and tired right now, somehow these thoughts lightened my load.

I can't wait for what is yet to come, to discover where this dissatisfaction leads.
****

11 comments:

stephanie said...

Oh me too! A new calendar is always a mixed blessing/curse to me. Mostly blessing though; I command it :)

Let's us make our plans to create stuff & schedule them before other craziness interferes...

Mrs. G. said...

I, too, have a calendar fixation, but I'm in a funk today, so I'll have to hold off on the Sharpie until tomorrow...it's only a day away. Your book is on its way.

Kimberly said...

So thought-provoking Lisa. Our dissatisfaction can be a negativity we allow ourselves to sink into, or it can be a wonderful edge that helps us battle our way to where we want and need to be. Well put.

K. said...

Zora Neale Hurston said, "There are years that ask questions and years that answer." Here's hoping 2008 brings many answers for you, Lisa!

katydidnot said...

is kimberly your sister?

katydidnot said...

i'm nosy i guess. sorry, she just looks a bit like you.

Bad Dad said...

This is why I avoid calendars. I have left the crazy planning duties to my Rain Man of planning.

-Stu

Anonymous said...

I am Lisa's sister and thought that Kimberly looks like Lisa too! That's funny! :)

Mama Milton's true sister,
Lori

flutter said...

I think clocks and calendars are the handiwork of satan.

Amanda said...

Mmm, but it's so dull to be on track. Here's to finding unexpected treasures off the beaten path.

JCK said...

I loved this post. "I am locked out of my old world." Beautiful.

And I LOVE sharpies! O.K., I'm wierd.