Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Tick Tock

I strolled into the school yesterday, taking care of some PT and A business when a teacher said something to me that struck a chord. A bad chord. A 'why do women say things like this?' chord.

It went a little like this: we, the _______(fill in whatever demographic you like, in this case, teachers), have SSOOOOO much on our plate, we can't possibly be expected to help out.

What I heard was: I can't possibly help out because I am important, and busy. You, however, clearly have nothing to do what with the vast emptiness of your puny plate.

This is not a working mom vs. SAHM argument. This is not to defend the time I spend at school, or on the internet, or on the couch watching Angel reruns. I'm not interested in that.

It's just that everyone I know is busy - my working Mom friends, and my Mom. My Grandma. The women I know with bitty little kids and for that matter, my hubby. (We ladies don't have the market on too little time.) To imply that my time, or yours, is expendable reeks of disrespect.

And we all get just 24 hours a day - no more, no less.

I plan on making a difference, filling in the gaps, changing the world. Raising healthy, sane kids. Keeping my own sanity. I bet you are doing the same.

*Edited to note: the teacher in question *asked* for a position, then stopped me at the door to complain about it. I never asked for her help.

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SusieJ said...

Cool. But, seriously, Mama Milton -- I don't have enough time!!

Daisy said...

I agree with Susie, I also do not have enough time. But I'll add the phrase "...to do everything I'd like to do" to it. It's all about PRIORITIES and what we do with the 24 hours God gave each and every one of us.

If that teacher doesn't have enough time, then so be it. I don't have time to answer the call to gather magazines for my Kindergartner's classroom projects because I am busy doing other things (like laundry, blogging, clipping coupons, whatever).

I tend to be somewhat judgemental toward Moms that work outside the home and only spend a mere 3.5 hours with their kids (1.5 hrs in the morning, and probably 2 hrs in the evening, which if you look at it, is only 14% of the day) because I was a latch-key kid myself. I really wanted and needed my mom but she chose to work (presumably putting "the family's" needs before her own, but really, we all know it was for her own sanity). Whew! 'Nuff about that!

It's all about priorities, IMHO. Tell that to the teacher that is "soooo busy" that she can't POSSIBLY help out with the dessert auction or fund raiser or whatever. Yeah, lady, guess what? Last time I checked, EVERYBODY is busy.

:-) Well, now that my nerves are all riled up, have a great day! ;-)

Lisa Milton said...

I just emailed Susie a ridiculously long note, feeling her pain. It's my pain too. Everyday I look at my house and see stuff I need to get done. I think of people I want to see, books gathering dust. It is making choices. Saying 'no' sometimes.

It's also an important thing to teach our kids. Lexi wants to do everything, she is a side-tracked kid. It think it's important to set boundaries.

And as for this teacher, she *asked* to do something, and then caught me as I walked out the door to whine about it.

I applied kindness, really I did, but I told her that every volunteer feels that way.

I hope I didn't sound like the crazy PTA lady who won't take 'no' for an answer I get 'no'. I like 'no'.

Be well my busy friends.

stephanie said...

I'm going to start Talk Like A Pirate Day a little early, in response to this - ARRRRRRRRR.

Let's all just say what we mean, do what we can, and be at ease.

Live long & prosper.

katydidnot said...

I will help. Can I help? The PTO won't have me here. Boooooo.

Anonymous said...

Just tell me who she was and I'll go to school and kick her for you!

Jen B:)