Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Bringing up Yeti

Date May 2007
Clark County, WA
Nearest Town Camas
Conditions Unseasonable sunny, clear, perfect
Time Early, very early
Description of the event

Suburban Mom rises with the sun, seeking a few quiet moments to herself. She glances at her calendar and stifles a hearty hurrah - today's date is empty. She will soon fill it with everything that has fallen to the wayside; she still has laundry to fold and papers to sign/file/deal with. But for now, there is a hush and a smile and a cup of tea.

SM starts to unload the dishwasher when she realizes she is not alone. The guttural moaning is faint at first, but grows louder with every beat of her now blackening heart. There are Sasquatch afoot and though she is no expert, she grew up with the lore and fears bigfoot (bigfeet?) have been squatting upstairs. That would certainly explain the odor.

These Yetis aren't stealthy; the growling and grunting has grown. They seem to be fighting with each other for sport. Maybe this is a rite of passage. Who is Suburban Mom to question their ways? Yet all the racket has spoiled the morning. She goes to the kitchen and returns to the fracas, condiments in hand. She figures that if the wee hairy creatures are going to gnaw each other's ears off before 7 am, the least she can do is lob some ketchup at them.

SM closes the door and lets the Bigfeet be Bigfeet. Surely they will work it out. She will try to get some footage later; you may catch it on the news tonight. She will be the one in the bathrobe, pouring herself a cocktail cup of coffee, something to wash down her 'medicine'.

Perhaps they take Bigfeet at soccer camp. One can only hope.

Source Fictitious Tales of an Addled Mind

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This Eclectic Life said...

Yeti? I thought those were the cats...

Lisa Milton said...

I don't think that Yetis are native to the NW - they usually make their homes in Asia. Same legend, different name.

Irene said...

Great read! No Yeti's around here, only crabs today...