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Friday, January 18, 2008

head towards the light

When the doctor came in and reviewed my chart, she questioned why I was lifting weights in the first place when I have an underlying connective tissue disease.

And I said: 'It's the sweet gym aroma and boredom and my lust for pain that keeps me coming back.'

(Fine. I didn't say that. I grimaced.)

It was the proverbial straw to a week of taking myself very seriously. Taking the blame for a fluke neck injury; worrying myself over stupid standardized tests.

way too serious

All week, I've been trying to keep my normal schedule while my neck heals. I've been putting pressure on my kids to do math drills with me. I've wiped too many frustrated tears.

Greg's absence hung in the air.

Then Lexi uttered the words I dread: 'I'm just bad at math.' It was a new refrain from her lips, echoing my own despair as a kid. I couldn't bear it.

Her confidence was needlessly tattered.

So I decided to jump off my crazy train. I took a nap yesterday. I decided I can't solve the education question overnight.

lighten up

And we found our sense of humor, buried under the weight of a long week.

17 comments:

Kimberly said...

Ah yes, the second picture? Much better. I need to do the same so, so badly. Thanks for the inspiration.

Mrs. G. said...

Hang in there. These are wonderful photos. Maybe the movie on Sunday will help.

Lisa Milton said...

My kids love to play along, especially since I was using the tripod I got for Christmas.

They are great sports and love being 'famous'.

Lori said...

I also love the pictures, as they are black & white. I have a thing for taking color out of pictures...I am in the wrong era.

Glad to see the serious faces gone!!

Lori

stephanie said...

I'd like to know exactly what gang sign you're throwing down there, miss...

So glad things are on the upswing. Let's get a little math party going with our girls and boys soon. Nobody's just bad at math; you just have to figure out what makes you want to do it (for me - SHOPPING! Once I got the hang of percentages, woohoo).

see ya*

KAYLEE said...

Great photos!!!!! and I dont know the whole story but, hope you are hanging in there.

lapoflux said...

a - the classic take a step back approach. The one I am so bad at ;-) Thanks for the perspective and have a great weekend!

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Get some rest and wait it out.

And don't despair--my "I hate math" 2nd grader is in honors math in 8th grade.

flutter said...

You are too adorable, you know?

kaylee said...

I love math am I crazy? I am very good at it too :P

katydidnot said...

really such good photos. hang in. things ease. i hope they ease sooner than later.

Minnesota Matron said...

Been there. Only you're doing fine, my dear. Humor and naps as opposed to screaming (which is what I did once when my autoimmune disease decided to make my life one constant moment of pain). It's soo hard. But I'll never forget the moment that I did just snap and scream, and knew that a different approach -- humor and compassion for myself--was the only way to go. Looks to me like that's a lesson you learned already. Oh, forget the word lesson: I like life skill better. We could all use that!

Oh, The Joys said...

I love those photos. I'm glad you found the humor. I'm STRUGGLING to do that lately. Ack!

CamiKaos said...

I am so glad you decided to take a breath. TAKE CARE.

JCK said...

Love the pictures! I uttered the same words as Lexi all those years ago. And now I'm the one who balances the checkbook, does thenumbers. And I'm good at it. If only we could take back those words, thoughts. Sharing humor with them is the very best gift.

Suzanne said...

"I'm just bad at math" was my mantra in school. Poor Lexi.

Your kids are so cute... even when making faces and flashing gang signs.

susiej.com said...

Now, how did you pull that off! I'm off to find the light...