deep down tired

It took me all day to realize I was in a bad mood.

My husband heard it in my voice, over the phone, many miles stretching between us, but I blamed it on our bickering kids.

I heard myself repeating stories, relaying negative experiences that are better put to rest.

Still, I'm a slow learner; slow to acknowledge, slow to change.

I am just thirsty for something I can't quite quench, and it leaves me restless.

So I tried to start anew. I sat my parched butt down in my comfy big chair and turned down the tired thoughts, hiking familiar paths in my mind, and looked out the window.

To my healthy kids, romping in the grass...

Getting along, laughing.

It did it for me.

I find I am never more thankful for this full life than in these moments when I feel so unworthy, and not up to the task at hand.